Five fab reasons to kick dairy to the curb in June

Earlier today I was perusing Yahoo News to see if anything exciting was going on in the world (you know, other than the whole "Weinergate" scandal). While browsing through the top stories I came across a fluff piece about all the fun ways to celebrate June, which is apparently National Dairy Month.

It only seemed suitable that today's Fab Five Friday honor "National Dairy Month ..." and by honor I mean rejecting completely.

So here it is you dairy-drinking, cow's-milk loving fiends. Five Fab Friday reasons to ween yourself off the teet - seriously.

No. 1) You do realize what you're actually drinking, right? It's like breast milk - only from cows - cow udders to be exact. Does anyone else think it's funny that we're completely grossed out by the idea of eating ice cream made from a human's breast milk, yet we have no issue wolfing down a big bowl of boob cream from another SPECIES? Anyone?

Mmmm .... big old cow boob. Got milk?
No. 2) Because there is a whole, wide world of dairy substitutes. And not only are they super delicious, they're WAY better for you. We're talking WAY better. How much better? Take a look.

So aside from the whole protein category, all those loosey goosey "milks" kind of win out. Did I mention they're delicious? Oh, and, no boobs were harmed in the making of these dairy substitutes. YUM.

Pear enjoying a tall, sippy cup of coconut milk. 
No. 3) Because cow's milk is designed for - you guessed it - baby cows. Just like human breast milk is designed for - you guessed it again - humans. Please note that aside from a few random cutesy stories about a cat nursing a stray, motherless dog, we are the ONLY species who steals another species milk to survive. Wow, we're such big bad top-of-the-food-chain humans that we can't even provide our own nutrition to sustain our species.

No. 4) I didn't want to have to go here, but because of osteoporosis. The United States is one of the only countries to continue sucking down cow's milk after the age of two, and guess what? All that gulping isn't doing our bones much good. So for the month of June, let's just say no to the white stuff and get our calcium from some broccoli instead. Who's with me?

No. 5) Because cows are living beings too. Let me tell you a short little story. Once upon a time, I birthed a baby girl. In order to feed my baby girl, I breastfed her. When I went back to work and had to be away from baby girl for six, eight, sometimes 10 hours a day, I had to pump said breasts. Do you know how much fun hooking your boobs up to a machine is? None. AT ALL. But I did it, because I had a tiny infant and I knew that the pumping was worth the pain for my baby.

Well, that's kind of how it is for a dairy cow. Except, their baby never get's their milk and it NEVER ends. In fact, their poor lives are generally cut in half after being constantly impregnated again and again so our lazy butts in the U.S. can make Ben and Jerry's on a liquid designed to make a baby calve triple it's weight in its first year. Seriously? I'm going to start a new rule. Until you've hooked your own breasts up to a machine and pumped liquid from them, put the cow's milk DOWN.

Yeah, hook that bad boy up to YOUR breast.


  1. Not arguing with you, I promise, but the baby cows do usually get milk from the mothers. My sister has worked on various Dairy farms and I have even milked a couple cows too. They take milk first for the babies, then the rest is used for Human consumption. The milk the babies get is not processed at all like the human consumption milk is. I understand what you are saying, and I understand what the other vegetarian reasons are, not saying you are wrong; just wanted to point that out. :)

  2. Im not talking about family farms though, which are considerably more humane, I'm talking about factory, where most big, chain brands get theirs from. we were near a massive one in Cleveland, and the treatment there is quite a bit different than the family-friendly farm. Not to mention many of the male calves from dairy farms become veal. I tried to tour a factory for an article and was denied several times.

  3. After pumping for my first while she was in the NICU for 2 weeks I cannot look at milk in the grocery store without my nipples hurting. Pumping for 30 minutes every 2 hours was bad enough but for a whole day would have been torture.

  4. It's completely true Cosmo! I remember after a week of pumping all I could think was "well, if I hadn't already given up dairy this would most definitely make me." Totally worth it of course, but it really puts you in the body of the animal.

  5. Yes, most large factory types are bad, but not all. The college my sister went to is Berry College and they provide milk to a lot of Kroger stores in GA. Very humane, very clean. That is where I learned about the milking process and that the first bit of milk is taken for the calf barn. I hadn't thought about the soy and estrogen studies until I read through the comments; you bring up a good point with the Asian cultures, I have wondered about that for a long time. Thanks for the insights!